April 13-19 Zermatt in a nutshell edited

So, we kicked off our Paris escapade on Friday, April 14th, rocking out at Java to some killer punk and post-punk bands. Then, with the precision of a Swiss watch, our Uber swooped us up bright and early to Gare de Lyon. Props to that driver for being on point, even before the birds were chirping.

Our game plan was solid: hit up Pret A Manger for a pre-train snack before hopping on the 7:21 train, first class, of course. Next stop: Visp, and from there, a couple of train hops landed us right smack in Zermatt. Cue the hotel pickup, courtesy of a sleek electric ride.

Zermatt was ablaze with action, thanks to the Zermatt Unplugged concert series. The vibe was electric, matching the buzz in the air. And let’s talk about that Matterhorn view from our balcony – breathtaking doesn’t even begin to cover it.

After a bit of chill time, we scoped out the local grub scene. First up: Hotel Schonegg, where we indulged in some fancy salad with Wagyu beef, edamame, hummus, and beetroot falafel. Sun-soaked and surprisingly sweaty, we wandered over to Brown Cow for a messy cheeseburger and some unintentional staring – because, you know, interracial couple vibes.

Lesson learned from that meal: choose restaurants wisely. The next day, fueled up on hotel brekkie, we hit the town, scoped out ski gear, and chowed down on salad and margarita pizza at an Italian joint.

But let’s talk about the struggle of snagging a dinner spot – Monday night was a bust for Grampis, so we settled for the Italian joint next door. Italian or German fare, take your pick – just be ready to splash some serious cash. We’re talking a Benjamin each meal, easy.

Come Monday, it was finally ski o’clock. Up at the crack of dawn for brekkie, then off to score ski gear that cost us an arm and a leg. But hey, no pain, no powder, right? Except, plot twist: the Sunegga funicular was a no-go due to some avalanche control shenanigans. So, off to Gornergrat we went, gear in tow.

Navigating the slopes was like deciphering hieroglyphics – confusing signage galore. But armed with determination and a healthy dose of fear, we tackled those trails, from blues to the dreaded reds. Then came the quest to find our way back to Sunegga – a wild goose chase with no maps, no signs, and more confusion than a Rubik’s Cube in the dark.

Amidst the chaos, a glimmer of hope: a flat stretch of terrain, the promise of Sunegga in sight. But just when we thought we were home free, bam! A steep drop reared its ugly head, sending me sliding on my backside like a pro.

Altitude sickness was no joke, and by the end of that epic 3-hour trail, I was toast. Skiing was off the table for me, so we took it easy the next couple of days, soaking in the sights and nursing a cold that hit me like a ton of bricks.

Despite the ups and downs – literally and figuratively – Zermatt’s beauty is undeniable. But fair warning: this place ain’t for penny pinchers. Three nights tops should do the trick unless you’re rolling in dough. Next stop: Munich-bound, and I couldn’t be more ready. Onward and upward!